Loving someone enough to get them into rehab
Many people feel like they are doing everything they can for a loved one by supporting them and helping them outside of rehab. However, when their loved one turns violent, or suicidal, or depressed, or even asks for help, how do you help that individual take the next step and enter rehab? Sometimes, treatment is the only option to save a loved one, even if they adamantly refuse to go. People often worry about the consequences to a relationship if they help force a loved one into treatment. However, the consequences of waiting for the individual to go to treatment on their own may be dangerous, and may include hurting others or themselves in the process.
A common misconception about addiction rehab is that a person must willingly enter treatment for it to be effective. However, many addicts choose the path to recovery because loving family and friends recognized the problem they were having and took the necessary steps to get them into rehab.
However, it can be very challenging to convince someone you love that they need addiction treatment. Remember though, this is about your loved one’s life. Helping them get the treatment they deserve may be the only chance they have to overcome their addiction and will show more love from you than waiting until they are “ready” to do it for themselves.
So good ideas about how to get your loved one into addiction rehab and helping the “talk”, the transition, and the enrollment go easier, include:
Educating yourself. This means that you need to learn more about addiction, specifically the addiction your loved one is facing. Some ways to do this are: attending meetings for local addiction support groups, like Al-Anon (for loved ones of alcoholics). Members of these support groups may be able to provide guidance for finding nearby addiction resources. Also, people from these groups will be able to share experiences they’ve had with you and you can establish connections with those who have dealt with similar issues.
Get ready to do an intervention. An intervention is a meeting in which family members and/or friends of the loved one show the addict how the problem has affected his or her life-and the lives of those around them. It isn’t meant to be negative or condemning, but can help your loved one realize the toll their addiction is taking on those around them, let alone themselves. An intervention won’t physically force them into rehab, but it does give the addict a real-world view of what happens to those they love each time they abuse drugs.
Have a plan. A plan can include discovering which rehab facility you feel will be best for your loved one, inviting concerned family and friends to participate in providing transportation directly to the rehab facility, and being prepared if your loved one refuses help. If your loved one refuses to get help for their addiction, you may have to be firm and hold strong to consequences such as: moving out, not receiving any more money from you, etc. Holding the intervention when everything is ready and the plan is in place will give you a much better chance of getting your loved one into rehab treatment. If your loved one chooses recovery, have transportation ready to take them directly to treatment. No “one last drink/hit” stops allowed. The most important thing is to get the addict to the facility as soon as possible.
Be loving, not judgmental. In the process of getting your loved one into rehab, find ways to allow them to realize they need alcohol or drug rehab treatment-not beat them up over every bad decision they’ve ever made. Remain focused on how the addiction hurts the addict and everyone they love and avoid condemning statements like “You should never have started abusing prescription drugs…” or “You’d be fine if you hadn’t hooked up with that guy…”
Be supportive of your loved one’s treatment. Help them by following the advice of the treatment center’s addiction specialists. If the recovery center has a “no contact with family” rule for a specified time period, don’t try to contact your loved one. Also refuse to pick them up or give them travel money if they decide to leave the program early. As a friend or family member, your role is to provide the healthy encouragement and support your loved one needs so he or she can focus on overcoming and recovering from their addiction.
Getting your loved one to go to rehab treatment may not be easy-but their life is definitely worth the effort. Begin to make plans now to help guide your loved one onto the road to recovery.